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Poopsy Pets: Epic fail in the toy aisle

By Gwen Rockwood, newspaper columnist and mama of 3 My favorite humor writer, Pulitzer Prize-winning humorist Dave Barry, is famous for the line “I am not making this up.” He uses it when writing about things that are so absurd that any sane person would assume he’s taking creative liberties with his description when, in fact, the description happens to be ridiculous AND true. I thought of Dave’s famous line when my daughter spotted a...

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A Tale of Two Dishwashers

By Gwen Rockwood, newspaper columnist and mama of 3 I’ve heard horror stories about how some spouses constantly butt heads with their in-laws. And I’m lucky because I don’t have those war stories. I love my husband’s family and he loves mine, and we’re blessed to get along the way we do. But there’s one tiny bone of contention between my husband and my mother, and I land squarely in the middle of the debate. Perhaps you can be the...

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How did I become my kids’ secretary?

By Gwen Rockwood, newspaper columnist and mama of 3 For years, mothers have been expected to wear several hats to get the child-raising job done – cook, nurse, teacher, chauffeur, psychologist, housekeeper, event coordinator and detective. But I had no idea that “administrative assistant” would become such a big part of what I do each week. It turns out that my kids – ages 12, 9 and 7 – need a full-time secretary to handle the reams of...

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My sweet addiction: How sugar sabotaged my quest to lose weight

By Gwen Rockwood, newspaper columnist and mama of 3 If you’d asked me a few months ago if I’m the kind of person who loves sweets, I’d have said no. And even though I didn’t know it at the time, that response would have been a big ol’ lie. I would’ve answered “no” because I’ve always been able to walk right past a bowl of candy without hesitating. Even a plate of cookies won’t break my will. Chocolate fudge? Nope, I can do...

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Top 3 things I’ve learned about stage fright

By Gwen Rockwood, newspaper columnist and mama of 3 Tomorrow I’m going to attend a luncheon and speak for 20 to 30 minutes to a room full of people. I’m headed to bed early tonight in hopes I’ll be rested and on my “A game” tomorrow. But we all know the night before a speech is often a restless one. I’ve wasted so many hours lying in bed the night before an event thinking about how much I need to go to sleep, unable to stop...

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Recipe for raising kids

By Gwen Rockwood, newspaper columnist and mama of 3 Yesterday, as I was standing over the stove stirring boiling macaroni noodles, I asked a question my family hears a lot around our house. “Wonder what I should write about this week. You guys have any ideas?” When you have a weekly writing deadline, you often pick the brains of those around you, hoping to find a seed of an idea that might grow into something bigger once you give it a little...

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