Often the best conversations I have with my kids happen on the way to somewhere. I don’t remember what errand we were running when my son Adam and I had this exchange, but I’ll remember the talk for a long time. Him: “Mom, I’ve decided to write a bucket list. You know what a bucket list is?” Me: “Yes, it’s a list of things you want to do before you die. You do realize you’re only 10-years-old, right?” Him: “Yeah, I know. I just think it’ll be good to have a list.” Me: “You’re right. So what are you gonna put on your bucket list?” Him: “Well, the first thing is ‘Be on a game show.’ Either Kids Jeopardy or […]

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Dear Jack, Eight years ago tonight, we met for the first time. I was the exhausted woman with the lovely epidural drip. You were the very red, very loud newborn who came roaring into the room at 11 p.m. You fit into my arms like a puzzle piece, and I marveled at your perfect skin and wavy hair. Your brother didn’t warm up to you as instantly as Dad and I did. He ignored you those first few months because he was only 2 years old and unimpressed when you came home and did nothing but eat, sleep and spit up on people. But one day, after several months of taking no notice of you, he walked by the baby […]

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Today I got a rejection letter for a book manuscript. It hurt. It wasn’t the first one and won’t be the last, but it still hurt. I keep waiting to develop the thick skin all the writing advice books say you need to survive in this business, but mine feels as tender as ever. Wounded pride and self-doubt spring eternal. I should have done a better job hiding the hurt from the kids, but they burst into my room to tell me about the new level they reached on their computer game and the tears and the red, sniffly nose were too obvious. “What’s wrong, Mom?” Jack asked. “It’s nothing, Jack. I’ll be okay,” I said. “Don’t you want to […]

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Now that our oldest son has officially hit double-digits in age, he’s thinking of his future – his driving future. His sixteenth birthday is still six years away (thankfully), but suddenly cars are very cool. “Mom, I decided what kind of car I want when I’m 16,” he announced recently at dinner. “That’s great, Adam. But you do realize you’ll have to save up your own money, right? Whatever you save up, Dad and I will match it and we’ll use that money to buy a used car,” I said. “Yeah, I know,” he said. “The two cars I like best are the Ford Focus and the Ferrari.” “A Ferrari?” I asked. “As in Ferrari, the sports car?” “Yep, that’s […]

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The snake sighting in our yard had been haunting me. Every time I stepped outside, I scanned for signs of it – the way wary beach goers check the water for signs of a shark fin. Then two weeks ago I was home alone with the dogs. Our beagle Charlie got restless so we headed out to the backyard for his potty break. As we hit the bottom of the steps, Charlie ran off to the left and I went right. That’s when I saw it – and froze. Another two steps forward and I would have been right on top of a 3-foot-long snake. The beast was black with red and yellow stripes. As I sprinted for safety, my […]

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Sometimes, in an effort to save money, we take on things we have no business messing around with – things best left to trained professionals. We put on our practical “do it yourself” hats and say stupid, fate-tempting things like “How hard could it be?” And then we find out. When temperatures hit 90 degrees last week, I told Tom we’d have to make an appointment to get our dogs, Holly and E.J., shaved for the summer, as we do every year around this time. He agreed, hesitantly, because he knew the trip to the doggie salon for two large dogs usually runs around $150. But there was no question it needed to be done, especially for Holly, who has […]

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There’s an old TV commercial for Tootsie Pops featuring a cartoon boy who poses this question to wise Mr. Owl: “How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop?” The owl replies “Let’s find out,” as he takes the little boy’s Tootsie Pop and begins licking and counting aloud. At my house, there’s a similar experiment underway. Adam and Jack are on a quest to find out how many socks it takes to make their mother insane. Last night, they came dangerously close to witnessing a full-blown trip to Crazytown. I know it shouldn’t bother me this much. They’re socks – not landmines. But what started as a pet peeve grew into […]

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Parenthood is not a glamorous sport. Often it can be downright humbling. Some days, it sneaks a toe over the line into “humiliating.” Last Sunday was one of those days. We got up early with a mission – get ourselves and the two boys dressed and ready for church. We’d been shamefully absent from Sunday services in the few months since the new baby arrived, and we vowed to do better. So after breakfast and diaper changes, Tom dressed 2-year-old Adam while I dressed the baby. Then I packed his diaper bag with extra changes of clothes for both kids, so I’d be prepared for a leaky diaper or spilled drink. After all, a smart mother has to plan ahead […]

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Most men don’t fully understand this, but sometimes a woman walks into a room in her house and knows, with certainty, that something has GOT to change. It happened to me when I walked into the guest room and realized I was sick of the varying degrees of beige in there. It felt dull, lifeless. So I chose a color, and Tom painted the room a cool, airy blue that I love. But repainting triggered a chain of redecorating events. The old bedspread didn’t go with the new blue, so I switched it out with one that does. Then the peeling finish on the nightstands screamed for attention. I started repainting the nightstands after Tom left for a business trip. […]

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