I had a birthday this month, and The New York Times gave me a wonderful present. On the day I turned a year older (which in Covid times equals roughly eleven years), the newspaper published a story so gross, so weird and yet so oddly fascinating that I’ve been talking about it ever since. Tom can’t figure out why this particular story riveted me the way it did, but I bet many of you will feel the same way. I’ll paraphrase the most important points relayed by writer Annie Roth who published the story earlier this month, complete with video footage that’s sure to make you say “Ew!” Here’s what happened: One day a research scientist walked into her lab […]

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Yesterday I watched my 14-year-old daughter text her best friend, and I realized something. Generally speaking, a person’s age is a direct correlation of their texting speed. Like my daughter, I text my friends often, too. And I’ve been using a smartphone a lot longer than my kids. But somehow, her texting speed is easily ten times that of my own. Her fingers move at warp speed. My fingers move at the speed of a rusty bicycle. It’s embarrassing. Unlike some, I’ve never mastered the two-handed method of smartphone typing. Give me a traditional computer keyboard, and I’m practically a Lamborghini, thanks to all the practice I’ve had typing essays these past 20 years. But there’s something about the smartphone’s […]

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Last night I opened a bathroom drawer to reach in for a clean hand towel. There wasn’t one there. I sighed and shuffled toward the laundry basket in the next room, where the folded towels had been sitting in procrastination purgatory for at least two days – clean but not yet put away. I grabbed a towel, headed back to the bathroom and heard a voice in my head say, “One of these days I’m really going to get it together.” Somehow, this made me feel better – optimistic that once I reached that elusive “someday,” my proverbial ducks would be lined up in an organized row, each one carrying a clean, folded hand towel. Just for the sake of […]

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Today we’re having a snow day. In a stroke of lucky timing, the snow fell on President’s Day, which means we’re off work for the day and the kids have a day off from school, too. I’ve been at my desk looking out the windows at a cul-de-sac full of fluffy white. Last night, I let Cooper the Corgi out into the front yard for his bedtime potty break. At that time, the snow was less than half of a Corgi leg deep, which meant it was less than two inches. It was a healthy dusting, but the tallest blades of grass were still poking through. This morning, however, was different. When I opened the door, Cooper and I blinked […]

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In my mind, I’m sitting on a sandy white beach. I’m lounging in one of those fancy cabanas the size of a full-size bed, bordered by white curtains fluttering in the coastal breeze. I tilt my face up to the sun, letting it soak in through my pores. I imagine it filling me with soft, golden sunlight. I can almost feel the warmth. And that’s no easy feat in frigid February. This mental beach vacation has become an almost daily trip the past few months. With the pandemic making a real vacation impossible, the voyage in my mind is as close as I can get. But at least the light is real. To combat a serious case of the winter […]

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Once upon a time, a long time ago, a guy came to my tiny apartment. I was 24 years old and on my fourth date with someone I’d met on a blind date. At the time, he was not my boyfriend. We were still in that oh-so-fragile “getting to know you” stage – the point at which any little thing could send the love train careening off the tracks. I’d invited him over for a home-cooked meal, which meant I’d made the one chicken dish I knew how to prepare. But there was no need for him to know that information just yet. A few minutes before he rang my doorbell, I scurried around the apartment straightening things and making […]

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Five days ago, I pushed my cart through Target and willed myself not to cry. This is ridiculous, I thought. I cannot have an emotional meltdown in the middle of Target. I blinked back the tears that were threatening to spill over, and I got on with the task of buying the last few things my 19-year-old son would need for his first dorm room. After being forced to do a semester of remote learning from home because of the pandemic, he would finally be able to move to his college campus and start a new adventure. But there was no denying that I felt like a human pinata. One hard whack and I just might burst wide open – […]

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If you grew up in a small town like I did, you knew one thing for certain. If you wanted to do something stupid that would likely land you in trouble if you got caught, you’d better do it outside the city limits. What a small town lacks in population, it makes up for in connective tissue – the way almost everyone knows someone who knows who you are and where you live. Do something dumb in a small town and there’s a good chance your mom or dad will hear about it before you can even concoct a cover-up story. One time when I was 14, I was supposed to walk our dog to the veterinarian’s office to get […]

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In a normal year, I dread the chore of putting away Christmas decorations. Not only does it take a while, it also feels like we’re packing up joy and shoving it into the storage closet to sit in the corner for the next 11 months. But this time was different. Once the first few decorations were put away, I felt… better. I wasn’t happy the holidays were over, but I felt ready to clear the way for something new. Something better. I felt the magnetic pull toward a fresh start. After a year cluttered with crisis and chaos, we all crave something clear and calm. So, I put things away with more energy and anticipation than I usually do. Tom […]

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Hey, 2020. GET OUT. You officially wore out your welcome several months ago. Nevertheless, here are 20 things I learned in 2020: 1. Sometimes disruption equals disaster. In February, news reports said a top official at the CDC told her family they should prepare for “significant disruption.” So, the first lesson I learned in this long, long year is that when scientists say things like “significant disruption,” what they often mean is that the proverbial poop is about to hit the propeller – big time. 2. Speaking of poop… Some things in life are important. Toilet paper is one of them. Sometimes it takes a global pandemic to make all of us realize it (at the exact same time). 3. […]

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