I’m a rule follower. Always have been. I’m that person who – upon counting items in her shopping cart – sees that there are 16 items and promptly leaves the “15 Items or Less” lane. My mattresses still have those annoying “do not remove” tags. So last weekend my three kids were shocked to learn that, years before they came along, their mother was once evicted from her apartment for breaking the rules. Tossed out on my keister for willfully violating the rental agreement. They wanted to hear more about this chapter in my reckless youth, so here it is: I’d just graduated from college and was living in a one-bedroom apartment on the second floor of a small complex. […]

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Some say life is a complicated journey, but, for the most part, it can be categorized by the type of mail you get. At any given time, your mail carrier knows more about your current life status than most of your cousins do. Here’s how it breaks down: Phase 1: The “Give me a little credit” phase When I turned 18 and moved to college, I got my first mailbox, a tiny metal cube nestled into a row of dozens of other mailboxes in my freshman dorm. I loved this little box because it was mine. Not my mom or dad’s. Just mine. When I opened it, I felt like a bona fide Grown Up doing adult things like leafing […]

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Thirty-four. That’s the number I counted while standing in the shower. As hot water rained down on my hair, I scanned the corner-mounted shower shelves and counted 34 bottles of shampoo, conditioner, body wash, face scrub and other various potions – not counting the bar of soap. How many of these products do I use on a normal day? Four. Knowing it has likely been months since the other 30 have been touched, they looked like forlorn rejects from past relationships staring back at me with one pressing question: “Why didn’t it work out?” It’s a hard question to answer, which is why – even in real-life relationships – some people don’t answer it. In modern slang, when someone (without […]

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The last time Tom and I went to a home improvement store, we bought a container of yellow mums in the garden department. The official start of Fall was only a few weeks away, and that yellow mum looked like sunshine and happiness bursting out of a terracotta pot. For the first two weeks, the yellow mum beamed its cheery sunshine at me every time I took the dogs to the backyard. But a few days ago, it began to change. A few of the blooms wilted and turned an anemic shade of pale yellow followed soon after by a dirty brown. Some even shriveled into dry, blackened corpses. So, I did the thing my mother taught me to do […]

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Last weekend we loaded up the SUV and drove to Dallas to attend one of the loveliest weddings I’ve ever seen. Our niece Abbey and her new husband Andrew are off to a beautiful start as a married couple. The day after the wedding – after considerable lobbying from the kids – Tom and I agreed to a quick trip to Six Flags Over Texas. To be honest, I was hesitant to go. Even in late September, it was impossibly humid, and the ticket cost was nearly as high as the temperature. But then I reminded myself that our oldest son will be leaving for college next Fall which will limit these kinds of spontaneous family outings. So even though […]

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I got hit on at the gas station last week. But it didn’t boost my middle-aged, mother-of-three ego because this particular pass didn’t come from a hot guy. It came from a fuel pump. I pulled up to the pump and inserted my credit card. But as soon as I touched the pump, loud music began playing, complete with violins, piano and these soaring lyrics: “Oh, my love, my darling I’ve hungered for your touch.” I stood there surprised by the sudden onslaught of song. It was Unchained Melody by the Righteous Brothers. Normally, I would’ve dismissed it as simple background music, the kind you hear faintly playing at the grocery store while you buy bananas. But this was different. […]

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I’ve got good news and bad news. In March, an international team of scientists conducted an experiment showing that time reversal is possible. But before you jump in your DeLorean for a joyride, I should tell you the rest of the story. The experiment involved a simulated particle – not one in real life. Scientists moved their particle back in time on a quantum computer. While I don’t understand what a quantum computer is, I’m assuming it’s more expensive than the Dell laptop on which I’m typing this column. But plenty of scientific breakthroughs begin as a lab simulation, right? Doesn’t this small victory mean that eventually we’ll be able to go back in time as easily as we rewind […]

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Because you’re readers like me, I know you’ll understand how I felt when I saw this headline in last week’s paper: “Stuttgart, Helena newspapers to close.” The newspaper in Stuttgart, my hometown, published my first column more than 20 years ago. But more than that, it’s the paper that reported news long before I existed and, I assumed, would still be cranking out stories long after I’m gone. The report said the newspaper is for sale now. Maybe another company will buy it and run it successfully for decades to come. I hope so. But it’s not just because the paper has a place in my heart. It’s because newspapers are a vital part of the glue that holds communities […]

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Tom and I met for lunch today and traded the usual “How’s work going?” stories. As an account manager, his work woes are mostly about corporate politics or the sale that got away. As a writer, my concern is almost always the same: “I need an idea.” Whether it’s a newspaper column, a website post, or a scene for a novel, I’m continually hunting for a seed of an idea that might grow into something bigger. As I whined, Tom nodded his head and wisely suppressed the eye-roll he must have felt. Because we’ve been married for more than 20 years now, he isn’t fazed by the ritual of misery I go through when a deadline is approaching. After lunch, […]

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From the unscientific research I’ve done, I believe every family probably has one – the turtle, the snail, the slowpoke. Do you have one? Or maybe you are one? In the Rockwood family, it’s our youngest kid, Kate, who is 12 years old. She has done only one thing quickly in her entire life and that was being born. Thanks to a C-section, she arrived mere minutes after they wheeled me into the operating room. If she had been left to her own devices, she might still be in there hanging around. Kate is somewhat of a mystery to the rest of us. She’s the only person I know who can turn a simple thing like putting on shoes into […]

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