I have good news on this rainy Monday morning. This parenting thing so many of us are grappling with and trying to do well? Sometimes, it works. Let me explain. When my three kids were babies and toddlers, my daily goal was to keep them alive. They were constantly teetering on the edge of catastrophe – climbing things, yanking cords, snatching up everything their chubby little fingers could grasp and putting it in their mouths before I could yell “NO!” It was exhausting, often terrifying work with the highest of stakes. Yet I never gave myself credit for it. We parents berate ourselves during the early years (or maybe all the years?) because we’re convinced we should do more – […]

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For decades, we’ve known that sex sells – products, movies, just about anything. But now nostalgia is gaining ground. Yesterday my 15-year-old daughter asked if we could go through the drive-through to get her an “Adult Happy Meal.” Me: “Is that a real thing?” Her: “Yeah, Mom, it’s a thing.” Me: “How is it different than a regular Happy Meal?” Her: “I don’t know. I think there’s more food in it?” Because I believe in important journalistic research, I checked this out. And she was right. Adult Happy Meals exist. The box is bigger. The food is bigger (with either 10 nuggets or a Big Mac), but that’s not what’s making them so popular that staff members at McDonald’s are […]

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I’m almost 21 years into this motherhood gig, and time is a great teacher. Here are three “rules” I’d ditch if I were a new parent. Make your bed: I always liked the idea behind it, and many people swear by it. They say making your bed first thing in the morning puts you in the right frame of mind for an orderly, productive day. But I also know that most things parents do get undone nearly as fast as we do them – dishes, diapers, clearing clutter. Do we need to add one more thing to the already long list? When the kids were little, I thought we should make the beds in case someone dropped by. I wanted […]

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The next time I get on a plane, I hope I sit next to an animal behaviorist. Because I have questions. When I watch our three dogs plus my parents’ dog play together in our backyard, I see strange things. Is this normal “pack behavior”? Or maybe our dogs are just weirdos. Here are three examples: The barking romp: When all four dogs go to the backyard together, they run in a clump around the perimeter, wearing down a grassy groove along the fence line. Three of the dogs are short and weigh 35 pounds or less. They gang up and chase the tall, 80-pound dog. They try to keep up with his long, galloping strides while yipping and barking […]

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You know how people say you shouldn’t make big decisions after highly emotional events? Because you might not be thinking clearly? Or it might be a knee-jerk reaction you’re hoping will distract you from the highly emotional event? Well, I didn’t listen to those people. Here’s how it happened. Last month, we moved our middle kid to college. I was hoping my experience moving our oldest kid to college two years ago would help take the sting out of it. It did not. Moving a kid to college is like taking your puppy on a long car trip – all the way to Michigan this time – then leaving him in a ditch and driving home without him. For the […]

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When Tom and I were newly married more than 20 years ago, we became friends with a couple named Jim and Barbara. They were older than us and had two teenagers about to leave the nest. But our age difference made hanging out with them even better. They had already figured out things Tom and I were still learning – things like perspective, patience, and the ability to endure home remodeling projects while staying married. We admired Jim and Barbara not only for the kind of people they are but also for the experiences they’d had. Jim had been a ski bum, a small business owner and then a retail analyst. Barbara had worked for the CIA and as a […]

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Food. I love it. I hate it. I hate how much I love it. Now that I’m staring middle-age square in the eye, food feels so much more complicated than it used to. When I was a kid and even through my twenties and thirties, food was easy. Hungry? Just eat. Want dessert? Sure, why not. Late night bowl of cereal? Go for it. I didn’t think about food because I didn’t need to. I’d lucked out with one of those young, speedy metabolisms that forgave most sins, even the ones including cheese dip or hot fudge. Then things changed. That dependable metabolism went from the roar of a fast motorcycle to the weak hum of a scooter that might […]

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When I was a kid, one of my favorite summer outings was to a swim park called Willow Springs. It was a man-made lake full of things to play on – springy diving boards, a rolling log, platforms, and slides. On two sides of the water, there was a grassy beach area on which to spread out towels, sunbathe or have a picnic. On the far side of the lake, a bright blue water slide snaked its way down a green hill. In short, it was kid nirvana. My older brother and I loved it – especially the toboggan ride. We’d never seen anything like it. Riders hoisted what looked like an oversized skateboard up a set of metal stairs […]

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Dear smartphone, You gave me a real scare yesterday. When I took you into the Apple repair shop, I figured some teenage tech wizard would wave a wand and fix the weird glitch you’ve had with your ringer these past few months. I’d been putting off having you repaired because I knew I’d have to leave you at the shop, and there was never a good time for us to be apart. But when your speakerphone started having the same weird glitch as the ringer, I knew what had to be done. The symptoms were getting worse. So, I hesitantly handed you over to the guy behind the counter, hoping he had experience with cases like this. I described your […]

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With less than two weeks to go before school starts again, kids have never been more interested in teachers than they are right now. They’re practically stalking them. This happens every year. A few days ago, my 15-year-old daughter told me she’s been doing research on a few of the teachers she’s scheduled to have. She texted friends the age-old question kids have been asking for years: “What do you know about Ms. So-and-So? Is she nice? Is she hard?” Then the friends text back with stories about “things they’ve heard.” I told my daughter to take these stories with a grain of salt, since teachers are often the targets of exaggerated or downright false rumors that circulate year in […]

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